Last night, Master finally decided to quench my thirst for wax play. I admit that I was a little afraid once He got the leather cuffs on my wrist and demanded that I keep them above my head. I had asked for this after all. The first one we used was a taper candle. It was the most amazing pain I have experienced yet because it dripped only one droplet of wax at a time. It was like tons of tiny pins being poked into my skin one after another. He interspersed the wax drippings with fucking. It was amazing...Every time I lost myself in the pleasure of my Master within me, He would drip more wax on me. Once I couldn't handle the single wax droplets any longer He blew out that candle and found a votive candle to use instead so that the wax fell more in pools and would cover more area. All in all it was a great experience that I very much hope to try again soon.
Sadly, I did learn something about why Master was so against doing many new things with me. I hadn't really realized how much I rebel against new things, be it food or in the bedroom. So I'm going to work harder on just letting go and letting Him call the shots. It really makes me feel like a crappy kajirae when it's so easy online to obey everything He says but at home things are so different. I'm still really hoping that moving out will change things for us because we will have the privacy needed to do whatever He wishes. He has already told me that things will change when we have our own place and that my role in our relationship will no longer be hidden. I'm really very excited for the idea of the rituals and rules He will be putting in place when the time comes. But for now I am going to try to be better for Him and work on letting go and truely giving Him control.
love and light
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